There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
