Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Randomize
