i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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