just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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