Yo dont text me then not text me
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
