People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Randomize
