Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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