so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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