some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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