I accidentally burped into my bong.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
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