it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
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