Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
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