fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
