im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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