He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
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