So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
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