What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize
