We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
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