Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize