are you so shy because you have an std?
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
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I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
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Boobs speak an international language.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
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