nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
