Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
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