Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize