Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
