She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I am midnight drunk by noon
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
Randomize