If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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