Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
