I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
