Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Someone came in the potted fern
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
