New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize