I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize