I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Randomize