I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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