you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize