So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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