Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Randomize
