I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
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That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
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Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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