I puked a lego.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
