I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
...so i touched it.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Randomize
