Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
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