oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
