So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
