The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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