Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
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If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
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Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
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