ADVERTISEMENT

• (908): View more from New Jersey

  my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation

  Fav 12 1961 918

  share tweet
  

• (912): View more from Georgia

  just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart

  Fav 27 17612 1444

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (770): View more from Georgia

  I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today

  Fav 41 5760 767

  share tweet
  

• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.

  Fav 61 29114 1717

  share tweet
  
• 

  If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (540): View more from Virginia

  Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice

  Fav 5 1185 3313

  share tweet
  

• (516): View more from New York

  The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.

  Fav 36 6251 1804

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????

  Fav 39 6709 1944

  share tweet
  

• (818): View more from California

  I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record

  Fav 5 1417 738

  share tweet
  

• (901): View more from Tennessee

  its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages

  Fav 9 912 1453

  share tweet
  
• 

  23 Struggles Kids These Days Will Never Know

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (573): View more from Missouri

  Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it

  Fav 5 1961 1180

  share tweet
  

• (614): View more from Ohio

  telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.

  Fav 11 2090 812

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (309): View more from Illinois

  There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.

  Fav 6 1162 650

  share tweet
  

• (973): View more from New Jersey

  He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?

  Fav 7 593 970

  share tweet
  

• (847): View more from Illinois

  this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so

  Fav 1 683 635

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (856): View more from New Jersey

  I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!

  Fav 2 244 127

  share tweet
  

Randomize