I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
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She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
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I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.