your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Randomize
