I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
She needs sedatives and a leash
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
