10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Still dying that you shit outside
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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