I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Randomize
