I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
My dick has a subreddit
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
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