I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
What happened to fro yo and sex?
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
