Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
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